MUDKISS FANZINE

Mudkiss is now an archived site, there will be no more updates. Mudkiss operated from 2008 till 2013.

"CHOKING COLLEEN', A LIL' CHAT WITH COLLEEN CAFFEINE FROM CHOKING SUSAN - INTERVIEW BY RACHEL

Colleen Caffeine is the singer and front woman of Detroit's finest punk rock band, Choking Susan. I would like to use her own words to introduce herself:
 
Photo Credit: D. Denizen

"COLLEEN CAFFEINE ....Vocals.... Being the only male in the all female band "Choking Susan" has been hard on her, I mean him. After waitressing at Hooters and "performing" at the Traffic Light, she decided to take a different career choice. "I'll just find some dumb rich man" has been found on her current resume. The band overlooks her lack of talent because they are too busy working on their own addictions. She is currently seeking someone to take over her role as dumb blonde."

Hello Colleen!! I love strong women fronting punk rock bands with attitude, and you've got a great sense of humour too, so I love you. Here's some questions that you may feel inclined to answer!

Rachel -First and foremost, how are you feeling today Colleen?

Colleen - Funny you should ask that..I OD'd on espresso today and had the brilliant idea that I should learn how to draw with my toes, hellen keller style and now I have a cramp in my foot that wont go away and a crappy foot art...

Rachel -Sounds good! Hehe! What do you think of all this highly marketed punk rock-whatever-type-of-rock scene we have got nowadays where you can actually vomit each morning over breakfast if you happen to turn the radio/mtv (or similar) on?

Colleen - I'm grateful for it! it helps me to keep my weight down.. actually I could be purist and say I hate it which I do but it has brought others to listen to all punk, old punk and a lot of the 70's 80's punk bands are touring again which has given me a chance to see them the second time time around being too young to have witnessed punk in all its rawness in person the first time. I tried sneaking into many shows when I was 12,13 but those days it was quite apparent that I was a little kid..what's up with the hormones in milk swelling everyone's boobs at 12 yrs old? and why didn't those hormones exist when I was 12???? ok, anyways, it also benefits my band because people aren't so fearful when you say the word "punk" and think its just going to be crappy music played fast , loud with the "F" word in it..

Rachel -Do you not hate the fact that today the trend is that everyone in the pop music scene seems to be a fucking rocker and has tattoos, etc. and can go to a shop if he/she wants to be, say, a punk, and buy all the necessary gear to look like a proper punk from head to toe in a single afternoon of shopping? Or do you think this is actually an advantage?

Colleen --It seems like a uniform sometimes..punk is like that though...got to make fun of ourselves..I mean really, sometimes I wake up in the morning ,look at myself and say WTF did I do to myself with all this pink hair and tattoos everywhere..my fav tat I have is the word "poseur" on my arm..that sums up punk.                                  Photo Credit: D. Denizen

Rachel -Which bands do you listen to now? You are a fan of…

Colleen - I'm on a Ramones colonic....I'm fasting and only absorbing them into my ears..my ear wax is even growing a leather jacket..if anyone plays anything other then them , I stick my fingers in my ears and go "la la la..I can't hear you"

Rachel -What is the last concert you went to and was it good ? (I mean as a fan, your own don't count here today!)

Colleen - Well I was just at Rebellionfest in England so I saw a hundred great punk bands..one of my favs was ANWL..the English Dogs were great too.first time seeing them...I saw the Boomtown Rats and thought they were awful..I felt like I was at a country Kareoke bar..it was painful to watch..but don't quote me..ok, quote me but I didn't say it :)

Rachel -I loved it when you decided to change the name of the band to CRAP! Why the name?

Colleen - You just can't lose if you call your band Crap !

Rachel - Is Choking Susan your favourite outlet for your rage OR do you use others? Which ones?

Colleen - It's absolutely the best therapy I've ever found..not that I was looking for therapy..at least not for myself because me and the voices in my head have become best friends but I feel sorry for the others..are you talking to me?..I'm a runner also..running soothes the inner naked beast that wants to torch things randomly...

Rachel - (Haha!!) I read you in an interview openly admitting to have an eating disorder since your teens. It's obvious that you are an amazingly sincere and for real person, but you don't read everyday people admitting to that so openly, and writing good songs about it either. Thank you for doing it, as you say, nowadays it is almost impossible not to have an eating disorder in this society being a girl. What is your everyday attitude towards the way women are desecrated on a daily basis everywhere you look around you?

                                                                       Photo Credit: Jeff Bedel

Colleen - There's nothing less attractive to me than a perfect face..character is what makes people interesting and appealing.individuality..something that separates one from the rest..it's almost funny when everyone does their hair the same way or wears the same Hollister shirt. I think individuality should be more celebrated..Patti Smith is one of the most attractive people to me..her hair was a rats nest...she grew hair under her arms...wore no makeup..look how you want ,not how society says to..who really cares anyways? My eating disorder is self inflicted not brought on by others wanting me perfect..I'm a mess and will always be one..I just feel best and strongest when I'm hungry..that gives me energy..fighting the bodies natural survival mechagnism! I win!

Rachel -Which other bands fronted by women (or women solo artists) do you like or admire? And, do you like Texas Terri?

Colleen - I love Exene from X..Wendy O ..the Distillers were cool and of course Texas Terri..I got the chance to meet her a few weeks ago and see her perform..she was great..she gives her all and she was very sweet too.

Rachel -Why do you think there are so very few bands fronted by women with attitude and talent?

Colleen - Too busy getting pregnant and cleaning the house? Menstruating should be enough reason to piss off women...I've got plenty of things to complain about..maybe we still have to walk ten paces back and only speak when spoken to..I still think we aren't respected or the opposite..people say "its cuz you're a girl" that we've gotten some opportunities..

Rachel -You are a very talented lyricist (well, I do love the lyrics of your songs), which one would you choose to define this moment of your life now?

Colleen - Thank you very much !! "Love Has Buried Me", absolutely..

Rachel - (Ok, thank you). Bohemian Rape, your new cd, will it make me want to smash the room to pieces? (If it does, it's good, and i wanna buy it!!!)

Colleen - It will make you want to smash the room to pieces and then put it back together again just so you can smash it one another time! (Good, I'm getting it tonight!) We titled as a take off of Queens Bohemian Rhapsody ..Bohemian Rape CD

Rachel - If you make it to the top, you know, mainstream success and everything that comes with it, I'm sure you have thought about it, what will you do? Will you happily play the Rockstar part, will you continue the same but with more money, will you retire to an island…?

Colleen - We will never ever make it big because we don't get along with corporate stuff..someone willl want to change something and we won't do it so they won't want us..it's opposition to authority and we won't let someone own us..we'd rather do it ourselves :) I would so love to live on an island though eating only coconuts and doing hula dances..that would rock (Me too!)

Photo Credit: Bernie's Photos                           

Rachel - How do you feel about the current state of the music industry? And the future of the artists in it? Is there a place for women in Rock other than just being somewhat sexy onstage regardless of how musically talented they may be?

Colleen - Those are good questions but you know what I was wondering..why do all old people look the same? they all just look like old people! (So true!)

Rachel - I was in Detroit a few years ago, does Detroit Rock City still rock? (Aside from you!)

Colleen - Detroit is flooded with great bands..theres a wealth of talent in all genres here...you can go into any number of bars around here any weekend and be blown away by a great band..the only problem with Detroit is people would rather go see stadium bands..it's sad really

Rachel -And now to end the interview, just tell us, let us know anything at all that you would like people/fans to know! Anything!

Colleen - I want to say to the people in America , like me, that are going to vote and elect a new president this year to not vote for some idiot just because he's different but vote for the idiot that's saying the bullshit that you want to hear...

Rachel - Thank you so much for the good time Colleen!! We are now all going to your myspace and buy "Bohemian Rape" so we can trash our living rooms asap!Lots of love from Me and all your fans, present and future!

Visit Choking Susan at:

And also their webpage: